Dear Reader, For the last 10 years I have been following the REAP process of writing devotions. I have decided to write a little differently now, sharing where I see God in my everyday life. I understand this is a change to what you’ve come to expect so if you don’t want to receive this type of devotion then I totally understand if you to unsubscribe below. Thanks for taking this journey with me of exploring God and what He means to us today. Linda.
Today I hit a new high on the scales.
If only this “high” was a positive, like when you get a high score on a test or someone gives you a congratulatory high five. Unfortunately for me, when it comes to weighing in, a high number is not really what I’m aiming for!
I’d love to say it’s all baby weight but I think the blocks of chocolate I’ve eaten while sitting on the couch at night maybe a contributing factor!
It’s very easy for me to feel down about myself when I put on weight. My clothes don’t fit, I’m more lethargic, I know I don’t look as good. I think other people are judging me but my biggest critic is myself.
This can flavour my whole life. I assume my husband doesn’t love me as much, I endure a battle in my head every time I put something in my mouth. When I don’t love myself it makes me a lesser person.
While God desires for me to be healthy and to be a good steward of my body He does not desire the self loathing that comes with my weight gain.
God cares less about the outside appearance but He does care when it affects our hearts. My heart breaks every time I look in the mirror and I know that’s not how it should be.
What I hate the most is that I’m so focussed on my weight. I wish I was so focussed on God that I didn’t even consider my outward appearance. Well, I’m a little more vain than that.
While I slowly start to work my way out of this all new high weigh in I hope and pray I can look less at myself and more at God. I know deep down inside that He loves me no matter what, and that the more I focus on God the better I become – both inside and out. But to admit my insecurities and turn to God can often make me feel more vulnerable.
Hopefully this post has stepped me in the right direction. May God be ever gracious with me as I bare my soul, and my body, to Him.
This article was written by Linda Bailey
Linda started theological studies in 1999 in Australia. After working for ten years in various church ministries, she now works as the breakfast producer at 89.9 LightFM - the Christian radio station in Melbourne, Australia. She writes blogs every day about passages she is currently reading in the Bible. Follow her on Google Plus +Linda Bailey or Facebook by clicking the like button on the right of this page.